My Blog

Apa agaknya khabarmu di sana?
Di sini ku sedang dibelenggu rindu
Beginikah rasa seksa perpisahan
Sungguh anehnya hidup berasingan

Hati terasa bagai tertinggal di situ
Meskipun tubuh dah jauh beribu batu
Sesaat seperti setahun lamanya
Semasa kau tiada
Apa yang terdaya…

Bila terasa rindu ku sebut namamu
Dengan harapan kau akan muncul dalam tidur
Bila terasa rindu ku bayang wajahmu dalam angan
Dan barulah ku terasa bagai disembuh

Jauh sekali hidup di sini berbeza
Beribu kali lagi ku selesa di sana
Tak sabar menantikan detik kepulangan
Namun hingga itu
Apa yang termampu…

Bila terasa rindu ku sebut namamu
Dengan harapan kau akan muncul dalam tidur
Bila terasa rindu ku bayang wajahmu dalam angan
Dan barulah ku terasa bagai disembuh

Terlintas di fikiran untuk meminggirkan saja
Semua pencarian di sini
Tetapi ini sebahagian dari pengorbanan
Bekalan andainya hari sukar mencabar

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfDx40Y4p38

Life…..

is filled with alot of fun loving people;

full of character and attitude. Each and everyone of them has their own weaknes and strength…

People come and go..

be it people who i care and those doesn’t make any different in my life…

Missing people especially those i love dearly and waiting to meet them every nite in my dreamz.

Disastrous dayz had just passed and the sun is set to shine back again..

How i wish i were still schooling and exams were the only thing in my head..

How i wish tt life was much easier and not as complicated as it is now..

How i wish tt poeple who i love would always b der for me.. wen i am happy or sad..

i noe it is just a wishful thinking but then again… life would be a boring one if i dun meet with any hiccups.

It would be more exciting and adventurous tt way, dun u think so….

Anyway… i always believe that every obstacles tt God makes me go thro, is something which will make me tougher n stronger…

So help me GOD…

Well… ON Sunday, i celebrated my ## year being alive and running on the place called Earth… was born on 3rd of August and currently feel very thankful that Allah has given me the opportunity to stay longer to enjoy the companionship of my love ones.

Thou celebration was not like the past yrs ( usually will take leave to celebrate but as this yr birthday fell on Sunday, it felt like how i would spent my time w frenz during weekend) , felt that it was one of the extraordinary days in year 2008…

Start the day with helping Kak Jun shifting things from Kallang to Punggol (the MOVERS for the day. Hahahahah!) Once reached Puggol was in a pleasant surprise as Mummy Renee had done something special for my BIG Day.

Once done, Kak Jun gave me a treat at HEI SUSHI @ Downtown East.. it has been long since i ate sushi.. After which , we went to Tampines Mall to get a brand new SIM card which Fajrina lost.

As soon as i reached TM, Kak Jun was in the mood of buying contact lens and guessed wat..?!! She bought like 1 yr supply for the store.. must be the free gift that made her purchase that many…

Prior to that, I had started to meet familiar faces around the place. it started off @ the Mac, saw Imah and BF. ( Imah was one of the Al-Falah Youth member whom i taught St Soccer)

Then will I was in the Watch shop, my hp rang.. It was Sam, She said that she saw me.. She was with her BF, the BF Sista and Cuz. I gone up to them just to say Hi…

Then while waiting for Kak Jun to complete her task to get a replacement SIM, i met Najjad and cuzz.. They were heading to Starhub shop to purchase / check out hp i guessed.

Then while walking back to the car.. I saw my Granduncle and his kids…

Told him abt the wedding invitation that was meant for his family. ( Danial’s wedding..!! hehehe so on 10th , have to rewang immediately after NDP…)

I still owe her a present so we decided to go to Levi’s outlet to get a pair of jeans…

After sending her back… I met Adlin and Cam for dinner.. @ Fish n Co (glasshouse @ PArk Mall)

Thou today’s celebration was a low profile affair, i luv it… @ the end of the day, I have lots n lots of cards from ladies from Pertapis, smses from beloved frenz, a bouquet of "flowers", 2 treats and a brownie w ice cream as my birthday cake…

Dearest Frenz.. thankx for taking the trouble of remembering my HAtchday thou it was not a significant date for u to remember… thanx for the frenship and i’m very honour to know u all , as FRIENDS….

Now i’m looking forward dinner w Maryanne, JK, Marky,Andrea n Irene.. plus tmr’s dinner w Mooneera.. hehehehe

It is nearly a month since we bid farewell to 2007… Personally, 2007 had been unkind to me.. i had alot of unhappiness and sadness as well as heartache compared to joy, peace and achievement.

Gone through alot of dissapointment in life.. last year..

and i shall put all those painful memories aside..

hope my life will not be overcast with dark clouds..

eventhough if dark clouds need to linger above me..,

May the wind blow it away as soon as possible..

May Allah Be der for me always..

May Allah instill confidence, preverence and good values in me eventhough @ times ppl who i love alot disappoint me over and over again..

May true frenz stay by my side always..

May all my dreams be fulfilled..

May everything this year runs smoothly for me, my families, my true frenz and my love ones

Amin….

Hey u.. Yes u.. i can’t wait to c u again.. Its like ages since the last time i saw u.. i’ve been waiting to c u again..

Questions like "How r u lately?" and "Hey! wen we’ll have coffee again" would linger in my head..

I’m kinda missing seeing ur smile.. ur dimple and ur bubbly ways of interaction..

Looking forward to be near you, knowing that u’ll be some where near me thou u’re not in sight. Knowing that you’ll e doin exactly wat i think u’ll do. 

Seeing u in person, haiz. this tots have been making me smile for the last few days..thou i’ve been down for the last few weeks…

Wenever i think of meeting u… i just gleam with light. I really miss talking to u…

Hey u.. Yes u.. i can’t wait to c u again.. Its like ages since the last time i saw u.. i’ve been waiting to c u again..

Questions like "How r u lately?" and "Hey! wen we’ll have coffee again" would linger in my head..

I’m kinda missing seeing ur smile.. ur dimple and ur bubbly ways of interaction..

Looking forward to be near you, knowing that u’ll be some where near me thou u’re not in sight. Knowing that you’ll e doin exactly wat i think u’ll do. 

Seeing u in person, haiz. this tots have been making me smile for the last few days..thou i’ve been down for the last few weeks…

Wenever i think of meeting u… i just gleam with light. I really miss talking to u…

I really would like to have the opportunity to know u again.. to be ur fren .. to be der for u.

If only i could turn back the time…

Nothing great was ever acheived without enthusiams and

confidence.

Success is not a matter of chance,

it is a matter of choice..! - Samantha Fernandez

This motivation phrase was given to me by Sam when i was competing in the 23rd Sea Games, Cebu, Philippines . That was in 2005. This year, i’ll be using the same exact phrase to motivate myself in the 18th World Pencak Silat Championship which will be held from 19th - 25th Oct 2007, in Pahang… The heat is on.. super duper HOT..!!

I am very excited but @ the same time nervous.. these are the usual feeling which i will have prior to any major or international tournaments which i will go for. Who doesn’t have butterflies in their stomach when it comes to deciding or doing something important to our lives.. even sometimes when choosing a small present for ur luv ones also you would feel this way.. ; " will the person like it?" " Is this ok ?"

For myself… i guess like i say, I pretty nervous and excited… I really wanna make my mark this year.. I want to end it with a BANG..! I dunna to disappoint anyone esp myself.. I will do and not try my very best in the competition.. thou i’m not defending my title this year.. ( became the World Champion for class "Open" in 2004, Singapore). i will be fighting in 2 classes lower than the previous world games.

I’ve been training almost everyday, 2 or 3 times a day.. thou it is the fasting month period. We dun really care coz the fire is burning and the blazing is as high as the sky and hot as the lava that awaits to get out from the mouth of a volcano

So peep, please, i would like you to help me by praying for my safety and victory while I ‘m der.. I really really want to bring back honour and the GOLD for Singapore.. Been fighting for my beloved country for the last 7 yrs.

I always beleive that the more ppl pray for you , the more God will help fulfill the wish…

p/s   I’m sorry if i dun have time for u, my frenz coz i really need to fulfill this dream of mine before i call it quit… I ‘m sorry if i dun spend much time with u peeps.. but reassure that u are always in my thoughts…. Always…

" U say it best, wen u say nothing @ all." by Ronan Keating

Whenever i hear this particular song, i can’t help thinking of someone.i’ve been trying to keep this someone out of my mind for a long time. the person who i am thinking loves to drink kopi with less sugar but more milk..the Someone is from my past… Someone who used to care for me. Be der for me wen i’m down and share happy moments with me. This someone was the 1st person who i gave a ride wen i just got my motor license wen Daddy bought me a Sefra 80 for my usage to school. I could still recalled vividly, that it was on Saturday that i had given this someone a lift. u noe how i could remember the day..? it was because that day we had NPCC CI area 16 meeting @ swiss cottage sec…hehehe. As i wrote this blog, i couldn’t help laughing over it..

Just imagine.. this.. Just after the meeting , told this someone that i want to send the someone back.. the someone eager to take my bike but scare lah coz i was a new rider.. so wen the someone took my bike.. the someone expect me to ride under 20 km/h… hahaha.. i told the someone better get down n push the bike… then the someone just laughed and i managed to send the someone home safely… hehhe

Tat was one of the memorable incident that happened to us.. We used to hang out together, always fetch that someone from school.. had dinner together..went to pasar malam and shared food bought from der. in camps, the someone always take care of my welfare. there was once during 1 of the ATC which i conducted… i was totally busy since i was the co-ordinator of the camp. The someone really made sure that i had proper meals.. got my safari bed ready. I was really touched.. those were the days. the person really pampered me.. hee i luv to be pampered ah.. wat to do..!!

Nowadays, i prefer to reminise about the past rather than thinking of the present. Now so many things which i din expect happen to me.  Love the care free life i had with the someone. Whenever we had dinner, the someone will eat my share.. always asked the same slly question " why leave this meat? u don’t eat this eh..?"

I always tell the person this ," I always safe the best for last" but still the person will take it..the person was the 1st person to realise the way i eat ice-cream..n the person ate similiarly like me..

Hey peep if u think i am corky, the person is worst then me… hehe… everyone always said that the person has thick skinned…  but the person has a heart of gold..very patience… lov to see the dimple wen the person smile..  heheh… Haiz.. I really missed this person alot..

Everyone knew how closed that i was with this person.   There was this incident that the someone one day was late for school. the someone called me to send the someone to school. I quickly got up and shower. went under the void deck but the someone was nowhere to be found. I went up to the someone house and the someone wasn’t around so i tot to myself.. maybe left already w/o me.. so i went to JI ( the someone’s school ) but din see the someone at al.. Wen i reached my school ( NP) i received a message ( those days we use pager ler) Aik…! how come the someone’s house phone no?… I called back.. and the someone asked wer  i was.. i said that i reached school already and i told the someone that i waited under the void deck but clueless of the someone werabout.. the someone said that the someone waited for me at the usual place i always send the someone. Haiz… The someone said that the someone will not leave till seeing me..the someone really waited for me. I feel so f*** up tat day…

so tat nite, i brought the someone out for dinner and profusely apologised. Then this someone said this to me… " How distant we are in future, How bz we will be, u’ll always be in my tots.." I always remember wat the someone said that nite til this day.

Des alot of memorable stories to tell but i guess to cut it short;  the someone dedicated the song above; U say it best wen u say nothing at all to me…so the song really meant alot for me… no one has ever dedicate a song to me.. except another someone dedicate kylie’s song; Red blooed woman.. til this day i dun understand wats the song is all abt… hehehe

so peep to keep this someone always fresh in my head, I’ll make it my ring tone from now on..and hopefully for a long long time.

i came across this poem in a fren’s blog. Kinda sweet therefore i actually took it from her blog….

IRA, sorry.. too sweet ler.. so no choice have to grab it… a thousand apologise

How do I tell you how I feel about you

When
everytime i think of you my body shakes
everytime i see you my knees grow weak and
everytime i’m with you i dont want the time to end.

When
everytime i look into your eyes, i wish i was there
everytime i see you smile my heart melts and
every night before i go to sleep i pray we dont end.

I’ve tried somehow to say:
you’re the sun that lights up my sky
the wind that keeps me cool on a hot summer day
and sweet incense that keeps me on a natural high

I want so much to tell you:
that without you with me each day my day isn’t complete
that since day one I’ve always wanted to be with you
that no matter what’s going on in my life
you’re the reason there’s a smile on my face
and that loving you seems to be all I need to know.

But everytime I want to
the words just wont come out
to you it may sound mushy or too cute
you may not believe it so it’s better I keep my mouth closed

Then to try to tell you exactly whats on my mind
yet I wish to tell you that I’m beginning to
love you more with each passing of the day
and that I want to be with you
come whatever may